Sunday, December 28, 2008
Mrs LivinInAmerica is currently watching "Spain...on the road Again." She invited me down to the living room to watch it with her. Within 10 minutes my anus was leaking that orange discharge usually associated with normal consumption of escolar, I was having dry heaves - having vomited the entire contents of my stomach - and I was getting ready to claw my eyes out. The stench of death having pervaded the living room, she released me back to read "Watchmen." And blog about that pile of horseshit.
Jeeeeeezus H. Christ, If this is what PBS finds acceptable to inflict on its viewing audience, at taxpayer expense, why not just back up all eight of the Budweiser Clydesdales to a webcam, give them a strong laxative, and broadcast the result? At least they'd be serving up fresher shit than this rancid pile. My guess is they had to hire a terminal alcoholic experienced in sieving food out of diarrhea to find someone who could extract semi-digestible morsels from the vast Augean flood that must have constituted the original source materials. It's that bad.
To her credit, Gwyneth Paltrow phones in her performance. She stands around with a languid moue, obviously hoping this turdfest sinks without trace before it can ruin her career. She's accompanied by a collection of eunuch gourmands who, wanting to have her six ways from Sunday - as if, fawn upon her and offer her delicacies, all in hopes, I'm sure, of having her fellate them while they stuff more freshly roasted chorizo down their gullets.
Spain, meanwhile, gets short shrift. It seems mostly to consist of highway connecting one piece of posing to another. Even the Alhambra can't move this crowd of self-involved hyper-sophisticated public masturbators. Instead, it's reduced to a chance for Paltrow to display her vegetarian bona fides and worry about the safety of high open windows. For the children.
Nobody comes out of this well. A bunch of bored hedonists standing around hoping for something, anything, that will stroke their jaded nerve endings, caught on video and displayed to the world. This, apparently, is the best government can find to broadcast. I look forward to PBS cartoons. So, yes, like Krusty the Klown, my question has to be "What the hell was that?"
UPDATE: I hear the US Government wants to start making cars.
Jeeeeeezus H. Christ, If this is what PBS finds acceptable to inflict on its viewing audience, at taxpayer expense, why not just back up all eight of the Budweiser Clydesdales to a webcam, give them a strong laxative, and broadcast the result? At least they'd be serving up fresher shit than this rancid pile. My guess is they had to hire a terminal alcoholic experienced in sieving food out of diarrhea to find someone who could extract semi-digestible morsels from the vast Augean flood that must have constituted the original source materials. It's that bad.
To her credit, Gwyneth Paltrow phones in her performance. She stands around with a languid moue, obviously hoping this turdfest sinks without trace before it can ruin her career. She's accompanied by a collection of eunuch gourmands who, wanting to have her six ways from Sunday - as if, fawn upon her and offer her delicacies, all in hopes, I'm sure, of having her fellate them while they stuff more freshly roasted chorizo down their gullets.
Spain, meanwhile, gets short shrift. It seems mostly to consist of highway connecting one piece of posing to another. Even the Alhambra can't move this crowd of self-involved hyper-sophisticated public masturbators. Instead, it's reduced to a chance for Paltrow to display her vegetarian bona fides and worry about the safety of high open windows. For the children.
Nobody comes out of this well. A bunch of bored hedonists standing around hoping for something, anything, that will stroke their jaded nerve endings, caught on video and displayed to the world. This, apparently, is the best government can find to broadcast. I look forward to PBS cartoons. So, yes, like Krusty the Klown, my question has to be "What the hell was that?"
UPDATE: I hear the US Government wants to start making cars.
Comments:
I think you mean laxative, not emetic. That is of course if you insist on the horses backing up.
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